Last Week

Last week we had some busy days.
One morning I went outside & thought "It's not so hot out! We should go to the zoo!"
That was at 6am, so by the time we got to the zoo at about 8:30 it was a bit warmer out.
Because we have a zoo membership (the best purchase EVER) we get to go into the zoo an hour before they open. We did discover though that a lot of the animals were locked away so that they could clean out the cages and stuff. But by 9 they were all out. 

I love crinkled nose smiles! 

We probably spend the most time at the zoo with the monkeys. There are about 5 different monkey exhibits and we make sure to hit all of them. When we got to the baboons they had just let them out to eat so we watched for a LONG time. 

Every time we see the Mandrills I think of Rafiki in Lion King.

And more monkeys....
Although Preston was more interested in the ducks then the monkeys. 

Jaxton didn't last the whole trip, but he did SO good.
This is the last picture we'll ever have of this pacifier as it got lost somewhere between the storks where we took this picture and the Kangaroo statue.
Fair thee well old Pacifier. We shall miss you and morn our loss. 

Later in the week we shook things up by adding bubbles to the bath.
Normally I don't do this since the boys bathe together and Jaxton tries to eat them.
This time was a little different.
He was very confused by them, and fascinated.
And then he tried to eat them. 

And lastly on Friday we had a Primary activity that was a "Drive in Movie".
Friday was an insane crazy busy day for me- 

Grocery store, decided at the last minute to make Preston a car (long story), setting up at the church for 2 hrs, getting the boys down for naps, lunch, painting the car/wheels, having to go rescue my sister who's tire blew out on the freeway and then drive her to work in Tempe & home, losing our back up pacifier (dont worry, it was found hours later!), finishing the car, bribing Preston to get IN the car with promises of gum, making dinner, rushing to go to the church, going back for the movie & water cooler I forgot, picking up ice, activity, cleaning up, home, boys in bed, working out, shower, SLEEP. Whew.
But in the end it was a good day. 

Here is his car that I threw together in a few hours. I modeled it after Guido from Cars. He would have preferred Lightning McQueen, but we didn't have red paint and I wasn't about to go buy some. 

This week is going to be just as much fun I'm sure! We have family coming in from out of town, HOORAY!!!!, playgroup, gotta start getting Halloween costumes assembled, more working out, and for fun a Justin Bieber concert :D 

2 weeks later...

It's been 2 weeks since THIS post.

Two very long, painful, hungry, tiring, sweaty weeks.

This is what my schedule the past two weeks has been like.

5:30/6- wake up with Preston
8- eat breakfast
run errands, Jax nap
10- snack
12- lunch
1-2:15 workout
shower
2:45/3- boys up
3- snack
5:45- dinner
9- bed

Sometimes I'll throw an extra workout in there in the morning if I don't have anything else to do. Sometimes I just let our trip to Costco or the Zoo count as my morning work out.
I've managed to keep my calories under 1400, which is no small task, but im not starving all the time like i was that first week. I've learned that going to bed hungry isn't the worst thing in the world & I've even grown accustom to eating an apple a day. Kinda.

There are definitely pro's and con's to all of this.

PRO'S
* I don't get nauseous and throw up every single day like I use to.
* I don't wake up for hours in the middle of the night for no reason.
*I fall asleep MUCH faster.
*I feel more accomplished during the day. When Patrick asks me "what did you do today" I know I will at least have 1 thing to share.
*I FEEL better

CON'S
*I miss naps. And having that time for myself to just read or veg out during the boys nap time.
*I miss bread and Dr. Pepper SO MUCH.
*I'm much more tired at night so I don't get to spend as much time with Patrick before falling asleep.
*It's expensive to eat healthy!
*Blisters. And sweat.
*Showering during nap time and having Preston wake up & come in and scare the heck out of me!

Overall though, it's worth it. My hard work is paying off. I weighed & measured myself this morning.

Staring weight: 207

Todays weight: 

199.5

and 11.25 inches lost. 

It feels really good to be out of the 200's.
So long 200's.
I wont miss you.

I hope I can keep this up. I KNOW I can. I also know that I can't expect results like this every 2 weeks, but I will take what I can get. Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who has texted/commented and talked to me about how I can do this. I only have 2 weeks left of my "Ripped in 30" DVD, so I'll be looking for a new way to challenge myself when I'm done with that. See you in 2 more weeks! 

Prestonisms

Preston went upstairs this afternoon while I was preparing dinner.
He came down with fancy hair telling me he used Daddy's shampoo.
Dunno who taught him to style his hair like that, but he rocked the look.
And his hair smelled good too.

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"Oh Preston I'm sorry, we don't have any more yogurt."
"its ho-tay, we have pudding!" 

He had pudding that morning for breakfast....

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"Noooooooooooooo Jaxton! Don't eat Tobi's blueberry toes!"

He thinks the pads on the bottom of Tobi's paws are blueberries. 

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*Preston smashes fingers in the sliding glass door*
"owww...that hurt me... I need a sticker"

"a sticker??"
"ya. On my finger"
*I think*
"OH! You mean a bandaid!" 

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*loading Preston into the car*
"oopsie. oopsie. oopsie. oopsie. oopsie."
"What Preston, what's oopsie?"
"oopsie, I thirsty for chocolate milk."

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*watching Finding Nemo*

"Mommy, Dori got hurt. I need ice. Put ice in my pocket, I give it Dori." 

"Dori needs ice??"
"Ya, she got owie." 

Mother-Son "Date Knight"

Yesterday Chick-fil-A was hosting a Mother son "Date Knight". We signed up over a week ago to go because:
1. I love dates
2. I love my sons

3. I love food

Doesn't he look handsome and all grown up for our date?!? 

Preston was really excited that there was a balloon on our table. He even stopped asking "wheres daddy? when's daddy coming?" long enough to enjoy it. 

Chocolate milk, french fries, chicken nuggets & ketchup and he was in heaven! 

 He was pretty happy too.

Me and my handsome dates. 

Oh Chick-fil-A cow.... if only you knew how much "chikin" we eat. You'd be proud. 

 They had a craft that we took home and worked on this morning, a shield that you were to draw your family crest on. The Design Tip said "As you define your family think of images that could tell the story of who and what your family is."
Preston asked to draw a cheeseburger.
That defines our family.

It was a lot of fun, I look forward to many more mother son dates in my future! 

A learning process

I love Pinterest. LOVE it. I've gotten so many fun ideas of things to do with my boys from there. I've "pinned" all kinds of projects/fun things for them to do that include food coloring. There is painting with pudding (dyed colors), painting with baby shampoo (dyed colors) and so on. Yesterday we decided to try painting with shaving cream. After an adventurous trip to the dollar store (good ole Apache Junction) we had our supplies & after naps we had our good attitudes to try it out.

Both boys went into the bathtub with the "paint".
First thing that happened was Jaxton stuck his foot into the purple paint.
Thats ok, I had planned on a mess (hence the bathtub & the nekkid babies). 

Such concentration while he painted his masterpiece. 

Jaxton alternated between trying to eat the shaving cream & painting the duck. He needed a makeover.
It was about this time when I thought "i better make sure that it isn't staining the bathtub". I didn't think it would since the website used the phrase "your bathtub will be nice and clean after your done!" It mostly wiped off ok, but since the tub needed a good scrubbing I didn't see any harm. Then I thought "i better make sure that it isn't staining my children" (yes, the tub thought came before the boys). 

Let me just clarify something. NOWHERE on ANY of the sites that I've looked at for finger painting where you dye things with food coloring does it mention it may stain your kids. Yes, I know that food coloring dyes things, but I just didn't think it would in this case. WRONG. Preston was pretty clean, but remember Jaxton's foot that he used to hulk smash the purple? Yeah...it's still got a purple ting 24 hrs later...
So the painting came to a standstill and bathing commenced. (that parts not pictured). 

But I still wanted to be a fun mom, and Preston still wanted to paint, which is better then him asking to watch Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs for the hundredth time this week. So I decided to let him go out back and paint on the patio.
Jaxton watched. 

So did Tobi. 

But then Preston started trying to paint Jaxton through the glass, and Jaxton was not happy with being on the other side so we had to change our plans again.

Third times a charm and we just did plain shaving cream on a cookie sheet.

Jaxton decided to rearrange the kitchen chairs while Preston painted. 

Then he realized I wouldn't tell him to stop when he used his hands and the real fun began! 

Pure joy.

For him too. 

In the end we had a really fun time with it, even if it took a few tries to get it right! 

Now if you'll excuse me, someone is asking to watch the "meat-mall" movie again. 

I'll Love You Forever

Jaxton is entering what will henceforth be known as the "I'll Love You Forever" stage.
You know this book and the part that says: " The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years  10 months old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!" 

I think Jaxton is trying to recreate it daily in our house. 

He is SO fast at unrolling the toilet paper.
And there have been times I've caught him splashing in the toilet.
The bathroom doors stay closed now. 

 He is constantly pulling all of Preston's "man-means" (magazines) off the shelf and then ripping them apart. 

We had to tie the fireplace doors shut because he would keep opening them and playing in the soot & then of course smash his fingers. So now that he can't get it open he just pulls all the pokers down. 

Dont leave any food around or he will take it upon himself to throw it on the floor. Or just eat it all. 

And lately he/s discovered where i keep my baking sheets and pulls them all out. Of course he bangs them around making such pretty music. 

And this is just the tip of the iceberg!
Don't let those big blue eyes and sweet smile fool you, the kid is TROUBLE. 

But at night time, when that  two year  10 month old was quiet, she opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor, looked up over the side of his bed; and if he was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

207

Warning- This post is not funny. This post is not about my angelic children. It does not contain any funny anecdotes or "I can't believe he said that moments. There will be no pictures of cute redheads, dimples, or blue eyes.

This post is for me. This post is about me. This post is embarrassing for me.

But it's a way to document current things and changes that are coming. So please if you feel like you have to leave a comment, be gentle. Don't judge. And this is NOT a "poor me tell me how pretty I am" post.

Sunday I asked Patrick to take a picture of me. I wanted to share with Krissa how my new dress that I got last week looked. I had my hair done, makeup was on, it was fashion show time! So he took the picture. I looked at it and then I spent the next 10 minutes crying.

I've never felt so fat in my entire life.
The dress is cute, the girl in the dress....not so much.

Patrick did what he always does when this happens (and it happens a lot), comforted me, told me I was beautiful, that he loves me and that the only person who would look at that picture and think "she looks so fat" was myself.

But isn't that what matters?? Doesn't what I think/feel about myself matter most??

At the beginning of the year Patrick and I had a New Years Resolution to get healthy & lose weight. And we did! I obsessed over it, ran 4x's a week, did workouts, cut my calories, and I lost about 12lbs in 2 months. I felt healthy, but was still about 25lbs away from my goal weight.

Then I had some issues where my hormones were way out of whack & other stuff and my doctor said "Until we get this figured out stop obsessing over losing weight. Lets figure this out first". So I stopped counting calories.
Then a few months later I went to the doctor for some stomach issues I was having. She thought I had an ulcer so told me to not do anything that I knew would result in me throwing up (i would get nauseous and throw up daily) while we were treating it. Working out aggravated my stomach, so I stopped working out.

Fast forward a few months to today. Since I stopped working out/eating better I not only gained back the weight I lost, but I also gained more weight. About 10lbs more. I weight as much today as I weighed when I was 6 months pregnant with Jaxton. And that just hurts.

But we have resolved to go back to eating better & working out starting today. I'm drinking a lot of water, keeping my calories under 1400/day (thats what I have to keep it at to see results), I have a work out plan (Jillian Michaels and I will be BFF's soon) and I'll change.

I feel like I wasted the head start I had. 25lbs is so much closer to my goal weight then 45lbs. I don't have a time frame for when I want to get to my goal weight, but I want to keep going till I get there.

So PLEASE encourage me. PLEASE support me. PLEASE send me tips, advice, new workouts you hear about, anything to help me. And not just help me with my physical changes but with the mental changes I need to make too. I'm not sure how to change how I feel/think about myself, and I need to.

And this is the part that's embarrassing.....

This morning when I weighed myself I was 207

My goal is 160 

I can do it.