"Cross my heart, smack me dead, stick a lobster on my head"

Yesterday Patrick and I decided that we were going to go on a date. After about 6 minutes with "Mr. Movie phone" I decided I wasn't really feeling like going to a movie, but that going out to dinner sounded nice. So then we decided we were going to go out for a celebration dinner. I'm still not sure what we were celebrating. Being alive? Not having a negative bank account balance? The fact I went 24 hours without taking anything for pain? We didn't really come up with anything solid, but because it was a celebration dinner we went all fancy and went to...

And here is what we learned-

1. We're not old! Everyone else who goes to Red Lobster is old, but not us!

2. We know nothing about fish. We don't know how to cook it, pronounce it, sometimes eat it. Our fish knowledge does not expand much beyond Red Fish Blue Fish 1 Fish 2 Fish.

3. When the wait staff at Red Lobster is "in training", they must shadow another waiter. The end result is something that resembles a lost puppy. I kinda wish we'd had our laser pointer to distract the lost puppy.

4. The following phrase is vital "The sun is shining, but the ice is slippery." Oh man I hope I got that right....

5. Lobster does not taste what lobster should taste like. It tastes dirty. You know, kinda like its a sea creature that has been frolicking in the sand in saltwater claw in claw with its lobster mate.

6. We like trying new things, but like having shrimp to fall back on when the new things fail us.

7. I love Patrick more than anything or anyone. He takes such good care of me.